Larry North (Cityplace)

This place is like a cross between Equinox and Diesel. It’s feels like Diesel because it doesn’t get very crowded and it’s in an office building. It’s like Equinox because it feels very spa/posh.  For example, they have two coed hot tubs. The décor is very upscale, you have fancy sculptures in recessed wall niches.  This place is like a corporate version of Equinox. Instead of a bunch of trophy wives working out in yoga pants this place is filled with people working out on their lunch break. I can only imagine the convenience of having a gym just an elevator ride away from your office.

However, one of the issues with being in a corporate building is that this place is closed on Sundays.  I repeat, IT'S CLOSED ON SUNDAYS!!! For me, that's a deal breaker because I sometimes have to workout on Sundays to keep to my workout schedule.  But the ambiance sure is nice here.

Layout/Facilities

Did someone say hot tub???

They don’t have a pool, but they have two coed hot tubs.  Nice.  The dumbbells only go up to 100#, and most of their machines, while not the latest, are all nice.  I did see a machine out of order, but giving that I was there for only one day I have no idea how long it has been like that.  The cardio section is pretty large, especially compared to the fact that they only have one squat rack. This squat rack was being used the whole time I was there by personal trainers, so if I had wanted to squat then things would have been… complicated.  They did have like three bench racks though, so if you’re like your typical guy you’ll be fine. They have lots of personal trainers, saw like four working while it was the lunch rush

As you can see, quite the lunch crowd here.

They don’t have an Olympic platform or bumper plates, but they do have a ton of padding so one can do deadlifts and not disturb the conference rooms below (The manager told me that this is, in fact, a real issue with the building).

They have a full basketball court, and man that place is quiet. It’s has a lot of sound baffling on the walls, so sounds are swallowed up rather than echoed off the walls. It makes for a very Zen basketball experience.

They are fixing to upgrade a lot of stuff. Most of it is structural, deadening the sound from the gym to the banquet hall below, but some will also be spent on equipment.  Given though that their target client is more corporate and less athlete/meathead, I doubt they will be getting more squat racks and bumper plates.

Classes

I didn't get to take their "Chiseled" class while there, but I got to look at their schedule and the timing is perfect for someone who works at cityplace. Otherwise, you'd have to leave work early/late in order to get to a class. This all makes perfect sense, but if they want to bring in clientele from outside the building they may have to start having stuff at 630 pm.

Locker Rooms

So fly.

These locker rooms are nice. Like, super nice.  I would say the showers/lockers are better than Equinox, except that you have to bring your own lock.  The products aren’t name brand, but to be honest if you have to bring  one thing (aftershave) it’s just as much a hassle as bringing everything (shampoo, aftershave, shaving cream, etc). The stalls themselves are extremely nice. Unlike Equinox, they don't have these wooden palates with screws that can cut into your feet. It definitely feels like a spa/resort here.

Surfability

The website says there is a free 7 day trial pass. The website, it seems, lies.  When I filled out the online form I waited two days for them to contact me. After that, I called them up and asked about it. The manager didn’t know about the 7 day pass, but said I could try it out a couple of times if I wanted to.  This couple of times seems to have been compressed to one day. I imagine I could have gotten away with going there twice, but I think the second time would have resulted in a lot more sales pressure, so I bailed. 

Lifetime Fitness Athletic

Liftetime Fitness Athletic.  I can see why Mark Cuban comes here to work out. It is a super clean environment, a person with OCD would love this place. The weights are always re-racked and are put back in order (I love this).  To give you an example of the emphasis they place on keeping this place clean, I saw four people cleaning wiping down the machines/weight room after the lunch rush. This included a trainer, a staff member, and an admin in a dress. The admin, in her dress, pushed a bench rack 1" back so that it was in line with the two other bench racks. That, my friends, is attention to detail.  

One readily picks up on the fact that this is a team effort and a well run organization where everyone pitches in.  Also, a lot of staffers here have earpieces, and I heard them saying things like "I'm on it" as they walk around the floor. It had the feeling of security at a bar with the communication going on.

You will also rarely see a machine out of order here. They have a full-time staff of engineers at the ready should anything break down. So if there is a break down, repair work starts immediately.  I think that is really, really nice.

This gym is similar to Equinox, but not as pretentious.  It's an expensive place, but offers a lot of resources. I would say Lifetime isn't as trendy as Equinox; it has more cake, less frosting.  They aren't going to try to get you with what's in their shampoo bottles, but with the programs they have to offer.

Trainer's dress is more understated than at Equinox, which I appreciate.  They don't wear lycra, they wear t-shirts. But you can still tell the dudes are jacked because there's no hiding a 17" bicep on a 5'8" frame.  I also noticed that they all had good posture/movement. These weren't just guys who benched and curled, they paid attention to their whole body and didn't suffer from "douchebag shoulders".

I was also told that in order to be a trainer here you have to have at least a college degree, usually a master's degree. So they seem to have a very high standard here.

They also have a food/nutrition spot. The Sales rep bragged about how their products are so high-quality Baylor hospital sends their patients here to get supplements/vitamins. So there's that. There were also ready to go meals that listed the macros and allergy contents. That could be really convenient, though I didn't get a chance to look at their prices.

They also have a Spa that is open to the public.  So if you're looking for a good spa experience this place may be what you're looking for.

Facilities/Layout

They have a very large cardio room filled with the latest treadmills, Ellipticals, and stairclimbers. I was a little surprised that they only have two rowing ergs, and they keep them in the corner of the boxing area (oh did I mention they have an area with punching and speed bags?)

They also have a basketball court. I was told their ultimate hoops program is highly regarded, but I have no way to verify this. If you know please talk about this in the comment section below.

They have a really large spin room, where there is never a line and you don't have to try to reserve your spin machine. Apparently that's an issue at most gyms, but they decided to make their spin room huge.

They also have a group exercise room, so this is where they have their step aerobics and whatnot (is step aerobics still at thing?).

Concerning the weightlifting facilities, they have tons of machines and quite a bit of free weights, I think I saw dumbbells as heavy as 120# (I have actually had issues with being capped at 100#, so this is a great thing). I think they had three squat racks, so color me impressed. ...Although I did see someone actually doing bicep curls in the squat rack, which is simply sacrilegious.  Obviously that isn't the gyms fault but it gives you an idea of their clientele. 

That all being said, they don't have bumper plates, and the gym floor kind of had a feel of a no lunkhead allowed vibe, but that could have just been me. I have a feeling if I deadlifted some significant weight and let it drop I would get a stern look at a bare minimum. So, for me, this place didn't feel... right.  They also have a strict no cellphone policy, so I was unable to really take pictures.

Take that Lifetime, I took a photo!

During my workout I couldn't find any parallel bars with which to do dips, so I walked around for a good 5 minutes looking for a trainer/staffer/employee and couldn't find one.  I decided to take advantage of the lack of oversight and take a picture of the lemon water they offer at one of the desks. Perhaps everyone was out to lunch. I eventually found the dip bar on my own.

The clientele is not as flashy as equinox, at least the lunch crowd.  There were some women wearing booty shorts, and one dude wearing a tank, but other than that it seemed more performance oriented gear.  I saw two younger brosephs working out and overheard one say "We could join equinox".  Perhaps they weren't digging the vibe of the joint.

Locker rooms

The bathrooms were expansive and very clean. They have a lot to offer: sauna, hot tub, nice showers, razors and shaving cream, etc., but still no aftershave. I guess gyms just don't believe in aftershave.  I couldn't figure out how to work the locker (each one has a key in the lock, but I couldn't figure out how to turn the key; stupid I know), so I just left the key in and hoped no one wanted to steal my very worn down gym bag.

Surfability

This was not the easiest gym to surf.  I had to take an extensive tour, hear a long sales pitch.  If you come here to surf you better plan to add on an extra hour to your workout, so eat accordingly.  If you really want to be a cheap asshole this place has a two week full money back guarantee, so you could workout here for 13 days and then bail and not pay a penny.  I, personally, feel like that's crossing a line from cheap to being a jerk.  But if you really want to stretch out each surf, there is that option.

However, surfing here will not preclude you from surfing their other locations.  I might have to go check out another location later, I know the north Dallas one hands out week long passes instead of a single day. Coming here also does not preclude one from getting trial passes at other locations.

This place is very good. When you join you will have a full support system: trainer, nutritionist, yogi, and 90 day programs to help you reach your goals. I walked away very impressed with this gym, and almost felt bad for just using their facilities. Almost.

Days in: 25
Amount paid: $0

Equinox - Highland Park

What's up peasants! I just dropped off my masaratti at the valet and am having an organic vegan juice before I  meet up with my personal trainer who's better than yours!  If you haven't figured it out by now, I'm working out at Equinox, the most expensive (non-crossfit) gym out there.

In a city that prides itself on its pretentiousness, Equinox was a welcomed import from NYC.  Heck,

Dallas's answer to the
"Keep Austin Weird" slogan.

the gym is trying so hard to impress it even brags about how it's in Highland Park.  I asked my sister, a naturalized Parky, if it is, in fact, in HP and her response was, "Eehhh, it's really not."  

If you want to try to impress people by the gym you work out at, Equinox is for you.  I must confess a certain... prejudice against anything that smacks of elitism by way of materialism. I went to SMU, which made me intimately familiar with the image-conscious side of Dallas, and not in a good way.

First thing is the people. If you're at a gym where people are their for the image, you're going to have a lot of image-conscious people. Image-conscious people tend to take pretty darn good care of themselves.  Thus, this gym is full of very fit, beautiful, and sometimes plastic people.  This is definitely the land of the $30k millionaires and trophy wives. But's it's also the land of successful business men (Who don't think that "no parking" signs apply to them). I've been to gyms where the trainers are sometimes sporting a bit of a pot belly or seem a little soft. Not here. Every trainer I saw could be in a fitness magazine, and every one I talked to was extremely friendly.

As one would expect from a place like this they have a very extensive spa. It's not just a room off to the side, rather a whole section of the building is dedicated to manis/pedis/facials/massages/whatever else they do in spas.  I was kind of tempted to try out a massage therapist, but it just didn't happen.

Layout/Facilities

The view from the Oly platform

The gym is beautiful. A lot of thought went into the architecture and it shows.  You don't feel like you're walking into a gym, but a high-end hotel or spa.  They have a group class that is in the middle of the main space but because of the frosting in the glass you don't feel like you're in a fishbowl.  They have a very nice, but small, saltwater pool that I was told is very popular with the triathletes.  They also have a very zen yoga studio with soft natural lighting, very peaceful.  This is separate from the Pilates room where the reformers are set up full time.

I typically use bumper plates when I can, and one time I looked around for the 45 plates and realized they have only two plates, and a trainer was using it with a client.  Thankfully I had a work around, but it was surprising that they only have one set of bumper plates for each amount of weight. E.g. only two 45# plates, two 35# plates, and so on.  although they have three squat racks, you could still end up waiting on other people for a long, long time if you're planning on deadlifting and want to use bumpers.

Group Classes

A nice thing is that with membership ALL the classes are free. You don't have to pay an extra $5 for a week of Pilates with the reformer.  So if you go to classes all the time this gym MIGHT actually be a good value.

Even their water is better than yours.
I had to look up GE Homespring
to see what this actually was.

I tried a yoga class, and was surrounded by women who, judging by their crows pose and standing splits, probably do this all the time.  I personally wasn't intimidated but I'm rarely intimidated by any setting.  The instructor was very nice, friendly, and knowledgable.  I think because the majority of the class was so advanced she gave very minimal instruction.  For example she would simply say "Warrior two to Moon's pose*" without much description of what the pose actually is.  I checked and this class is for all levels so again I think if I wasn't the only yoga noob she would've explained more.

Also, the mats are cleaned after each use, but not by you. After class you just put them in the used mat pile and let some one else deal with it. Living the life.

I also got to try their RX series class. I do a lot of mobility work on my own, and this class works on the parasympathetic system, so I was curious to experience mobility work in a class setting.  It was only 30 minutes long, but the instructor was an anatomy geek like me (her eyes lit up when I mentioned "infraspinatus").  I was also introduced to Yoga Tune up balls, which are a little softer than the lacrosse ball I'm used to and actually work better because of it. So I'm glad I went.

Showers

When I was given the tour and we arrived at the locker room, the guy pointed out the khiel products and said, "the goal is so that you don't have to bring any of that stuff to the gym". I decided to take him at his word and see what happened.  Some things worked well, others.... did not.

The shower itself was excellent. Slotted teak(?) wood floors gives you a spa/beach feel. However, more than once I stepped on a sharp screw head sticking out and that did not tickle.  The tiling was excellent and the shower head was top notch; everything was very clean. I had to wait a while for hot water to show up, which was surprising.  Once the water got hot, however, it got really hot.

Pay $150/mo for $80
worth of products.

The khiels products were, as expected, excellent. I left the stall smelling slightly of grapefruit and feeling clean. However, when it came to shaving and styling my hair I was disappointed.  The razors provided were fine, but the shaving cream was not khiels, it was old-school barbasol foam.  I'm not a foam man myself but I gave it a try and I definitely cut myself a couple of times. Perhaps it was the bic razor, I don't know.  After shaving, I then realized there was no aftershave provided.  This was a little alarming as I could feel my skin dry and tighten up.  I decided to use some of the free khiels body lotion provided, but it wasn't the same as real aftershave.

I then tried the non-khiels hair gel that is provided. I found it.... lacking.  It didn't provide any real hold and smelled/felt like rubbing alcohol, which is a filler for lesser quality gels.  So all in all if you plan to shower here bring your shaving equipment and hair supplies. This reminds me of my studio apartment back in law school where they said it came with all appliances only for me to realize upon moving in that it didn't have a dishwasher. "All khiels products" just means lotion, soap, shampoo, and conditioner.

Normally I don't care about this kind of thing, I mean this is the first time I've used a gym's shower.  But if a part of your marketing scheme is what's inside the shampoo bottles then you better damn well back it up. For the money that they charge here, I would expect a better experience. I mean come on, provide at least some kind of aftershave to go with the razor and shaving creme.

Surfability

Only an X5, so he had to
park in an actual parking spot.

This was an incredibly easy gym to surf.  Perhaps it's because I have friends who are trainers here but I was expecting more of a hard sale.  I was simply given a tour of the facilities, given my card, and then left on my merry way.  I was also surprised to learn that their free trial pass is a whole week.  With a place like this I was expecting a day at most.

I should also note that you should view equinox in private mode on your browser. They should
#preapologize for taking over all of my banner ads. God I'm tired of that guy in a tux in a pool.  What the hell does that have to do with working out???

This was actually really fun.  It was cool to see how different this gym is from others.  By the third day I had fully embraced the Equinox lifestyle and was almost expecting some one to be there to load/unload my bar for me.  I was very impressed with the customer service, everyone is very nice and it really does have the feel of a high end hotel/spa.  Sadly, however, my time here has come to an end, so it's on to the next one.

Days in: 24
Amount paid: $0

*I have no idea if that's a real thing I just remember those two poses being mentioned.